They say music is what feeling sounds like. Music, for me, is what healing sounds like. It’s what I turn on when I’m having a good day and want to dance around my room. It’s what I listen to when I’ve had a bad day and I find I can relate to the lyrics. It’s my pain medicine, the thing I listen to that takes my mind off of my current situation and gives me relief. I gain strength from my favorite song, draw hope from listening to the lyrics. Music is my medicine, my weapon against the bad days.
The process of creating and listening to music has become therapeutic for me. It’s given me the courage to come out of my shell and live a little. When I play music, I forget the rest of the world exists. When I listen to music, nothing else matters.
When I was in the hospital this last time, I found myself creating a hospital soundtrack. There were different songs for IV pokes, X-rays, Picc line placements and seemingly endless nights filled with pain. Having these songs I could go to made things a little less scary, a little easier to deal with.
When I was diagnosed, music became my safe haven. It was the one place where I felt like I could breathe. When my heart was breaking the one thing I could do was pick up my guitar and play a few chords, or stick in my earphones and lose myself in the words.
I truly believe music has the power to heal. My first melodic caring project took place on the anniversary of the day I went into a coma. I was feeling sick, and contemplated skipping the concert all together and going to bed early. But something inside of me said “Just half an hour” and so I turned on my computer. That concert was one of the most powerful things I have ever experienced.
The support I received from the melodic caring project staff and from the artists inspired me. I felt like there were these people out there who wanted me to keep fighting, who wanted to let me know I wasn’t alone. I went from crying one minute, overwhelmed by the support and love I was feeling, to dancing around my room with my IV pole the next.
The ability to turn on my speakers and say “That’s my song,” is still one of the coolest feelings I have ever experienced. I can’t explain how overwhelming and wonderful it is to know that there is someone out there in your corner, who sees how hard daily life is and wants to step in and walk with you.
For me, music feels like coming home. The melodic caring project feels like family. From the minute I entered my first concert, I felt overwhelming love and felt like I mattered. My story mattered, what I was going through mattered, and I mattered as a human being.
Music is what feeling sounds like. Music is what healing sounds like. It has the power to bring people back to life. I’ve seen it. I’ve experienced it. It is powerful, and beautiful. And I will be forever grateful to the Melodic Caring project for stepping in during some of my darkest days and saying “We’re here for you, and we love you. You are the RockSTAR.”
They gave me something that goes farther than a concert. They gave me hope.
-Alisha
RockSTAR
